Are you divorced? Have you been divorced a long time? I have not. It’s been 19 months since my life was completely shattered and changed forever. Little did I know how devastating and hard being divorced would be. However, I made a decision recently to stop being so hard on myself and move on the best way I know how.
In case this is your first time stopping by, I was married for 13 years (together 14 years) and had two beautiful daughters. Ashley and Hannah are now 10 and 9 years old. I had been a stay at home mom for 9 years when divorce papers were filed. I had opened my etsy shop back in October 2009 and five years later my marriage ended. Why do I share this?….because my business played a big role when my marital problems started. I was that mom who struggled juggling being a wife, mom, sister, friend and run a home-based business. I was thrilled to have found a creative outlet and something I was truly passionate about. However, my ex husband wasn’t so thrilled. He was not a fan. He did not support my new passion. He was not happy or encouraging about growing my business. It was a constant battle so we began marriage counseling in 2010. We went to several counselors, but we were unsuccessful and decided to divorce. There is obviously more to the story but this was the main reason our marriage ended. I am not trying to blame all on him or make him look like the bad guy. I made lots of mistakes and I didn’t want to “submit” to his traditional and old fashioned beliefs. I wanted to be married to someone who made me feel like an equal partner and no less. The more controlling he was, the worse I felt. I wanted to feel valued, loved, appreciated and admired. If you are a stay at home mom, you know it’s easy to feel unappreciated and like nobody ever notices what you do all day every day. My focus shifted to my business, crafting every day and creating beautiful parties for our daughters, photo shoots and collaborations with other women in this type of business. I felt my needs were being met if I focused my energy on the business instead of dwelling on my marriage problems.
I wanted to keep growing my business, I wanted to create parties, share ideas, write my book, and earn enough money to create a non-profit organization who helps single moms to throw parties for their kids. I don’t have to give up because the world wants to label me as “divorced” and because my marriage failed.
You see? I love quotes! They are so inspiring huh? This one by Albert Einstein is so fabulous because I dream so big sometimes and I had stopped doing what I really want to do after my marriage was crumbling. I want to shift the focus of this blog and make it my real life journal. I want to inspire others to be transparent and create a community where we all can relate. Life is hard, but it’s still beautiful. Staying positive is key. The end to a chapter in your life isn’t always a bad thing.
Another awesome quote that truly hits home for me. I have lost myself these past 19 months and satan has been attacking me but, I choose to believe my God! He is much bigger than any of the struggles, difficulties, challenges and storms I face. I cling to His word and speak daily affirmations for my life and the girls.
His word is full of promises that let me look to a brighter future and I hope you do the same if you are divorced. This verse on Psalms 46:5 “God is with her, she will not fail” is one of my favorites. I am thankful I am not alone. I draw strength and endurance from Him. My faith keeps me going. I will not fail. That is BIG!
I have had to learn to love myself, forgive myself and accept myself after divorce. I want to shine for God and honor him with my life. It is hard work my friends and not easy by any means. I am so imperfect and writing this post has truly humbled me. You will keep me accountable.
I believe in God and His promises. He will “double my gain for my pain” as Joyce Meyer has said before. I choose joy because God is the main source for my happiness. I want to feel He is enough in my life and everything else is a bonus.
Have you found something you are super excited and passionate about? Keep working on it. Don’t give up. Don’t let anyone steal your dreams. God gave you talents and creativity for a purpose.
I want to honor God when creating parties, celebrating all special occasions and writing on my blog. You will see more personal posts about my life and the girls and anything else that weighs heavy on my heart. A to Zebra Celebrations will be a lifestyle blog that will cover anything from A to Z because life is worth celebrating no matter what our circumstances are! It’s all about our attitude and focusing on the one and only who breathes life, Jesus my Lord and Savior!
And last but not least, life after divorce isn’t all that bad……in case you didn’t know I work part-time at a local Buffalo Wild Wings. I love being around people and I have the best customers! People are so generous and I’m happy to share that I will be completely debt free very soon. That is a huuuuuge accomplishment because I have been wanting to buy a new home for the girls and I. Thank you Lord for blessing me so much!
“Believe in yourself and all that you are. Know that there is something inside you that is greater than any obstacle” ~Christian D. Larson~
If you are still reading, THANK YOU!! This was a longer post than I had planned but I really wanted to share how imperfect life is. I don’t pretend to have it all together because I really don’t. I’m an ordinary single mom living one day at at time.
Now, that the mask is off….. am I alone in this journey? are you willing to share your story with me? perhaps you are divorced and have something I’d enjoy reading? Leave a comment with your blog post and I will pop in to read! Have a wonderful day/night!